Words to me are something that sometimes come natural. Sometimes i have to think about them. Speech, lyrics, words, communication, etc. is very important to me. Whether it be of affirmation, of correction, of declaration, or of verification. Without verbal or textual communication, i'd die. If i had a super power, it wouldn't be the ability to fly, or shoot lasers from my pinkies, or turn faces into ice. It'd be to know the thoughts of people. That would probably be more dangerous than not. But i'd take the chance. When i don't know the thought patterns of people, it's normal, yes. But still makes me wonder. Communication between people has many patterns. Sentence structure vs. thought patterns. What if people say exactly what they're thinking? What if people don't say what they're thinking at all? Both have pro's and cons. I'd take the former over the latter latter. But that's just me.
On a completely random note. It's a completely wonderful day to be alive.
Mar 31, 2010
Mar 24, 2010
Types.
Airports bring in all kinds of people.
People that don't want to go where they're destination is. People that didn't want to come back from where they were.
People still trying to find what they want out of life. People who are happy.
People with no luggage. People with too much luggage.
People that don't want to say good bye. People that don't have problems saying good bye.
People that have one to many matching articles of clothing.
People sprinting. People crawling.
Pregnant ladies. Ladies that look pregnant.
People with coffee. People that need coffee.
People using pay phones. People that have three cell phones.
People buying things. People selling things.
People who don't speak english. People who fake accents to avoid people trying to sell them something (a;sldkfjasdflakj)
People who are confident. People who aren't.
People with tattoos. People with with perfect complexions.
People who like John Mayer. People who hate John Mayer
All colors, shapes, religions.
People with iPhones. People who still have Nokias.
Old. Young.
Ghetto. Preppy.
People who can rock a V-neck. People who don't ever need to look at a V-neck again.
People traveling for business. Or for vacation. Or for family. Or for a change.
Couples that match. Couples that don't.
People that don't want to go where they're destination is. People that didn't want to come back from where they were.
People still trying to find what they want out of life. People who are happy.
People with no luggage. People with too much luggage.
People that don't want to say good bye. People that don't have problems saying good bye.
People that have one to many matching articles of clothing.
People sprinting. People crawling.
Pregnant ladies. Ladies that look pregnant.
People with coffee. People that need coffee.
People using pay phones. People that have three cell phones.
People buying things. People selling things.
People who don't speak english. People who fake accents to avoid people trying to sell them something (a;sldkfjasdflakj)
People who are confident. People who aren't.
People with tattoos. People with with perfect complexions.
People who like John Mayer. People who hate John Mayer
All colors, shapes, religions.
People with iPhones. People who still have Nokias.
Old. Young.
Ghetto. Preppy.
People who can rock a V-neck. People who don't ever need to look at a V-neck again.
People traveling for business. Or for vacation. Or for family. Or for a change.
Couples that match. Couples that don't.
Mar 23, 2010
the beauty of grace is that it makes life not fair
"So you say, you've given up you'll never try again
You've run the race, you did your best and what a race it's been
But have you tried leaning on the everlasting arms?
Have you tried coming to the Master as you are?
You say grace is free, but i feel like I steal it every day
I'm so unclean, look what this sinful life has done
But have you tried leaning on the everlasting arms?
Have you tried coming to the Master as you are?"
-Brandon Freeman
These lyrics written by my cousin echo my sentiments exactly.
Grace is new every morning. Yet somehow I feel we all abuse it. Every day.
That's why the love of God is so difficult to understand. We judge each other based on looks, words, actions, and faults. Yet, nothing of such even phases God. Not even our difficulties, downfalls, mistakes, etc. The love of God far surpasses any human love that can be given. No matter how many times we make a mistake, Jesus loves us. That's unconditional love. At it's finest.
I feel like i steal grace, but yet Jesus is standing arms wide open, offering his mercy. This should make us all strive not to fall, yet to get up when we do. Come boldly before the Throne right? Let's do it.
You've run the race, you did your best and what a race it's been
But have you tried leaning on the everlasting arms?
Have you tried coming to the Master as you are?
You say grace is free, but i feel like I steal it every day
I'm so unclean, look what this sinful life has done
But have you tried leaning on the everlasting arms?
Have you tried coming to the Master as you are?"
-Brandon Freeman
These lyrics written by my cousin echo my sentiments exactly.
Grace is new every morning. Yet somehow I feel we all abuse it. Every day.
That's why the love of God is so difficult to understand. We judge each other based on looks, words, actions, and faults. Yet, nothing of such even phases God. Not even our difficulties, downfalls, mistakes, etc. The love of God far surpasses any human love that can be given. No matter how many times we make a mistake, Jesus loves us. That's unconditional love. At it's finest.
I feel like i steal grace, but yet Jesus is standing arms wide open, offering his mercy. This should make us all strive not to fall, yet to get up when we do. Come boldly before the Throne right? Let's do it.
Mar 20, 2010
Reaching upward.
Maybe you've been a part of journey on a road in common with others.
Then you maybe realize that you need to take an alternate road.
But. You've been on that road for a while. You can't just leave them hanging.
But. Wonder if they're on the wrong road. Maybe you've found a better road. A, say, cleaner; less hazardous road.
Don't worry about the others. Go for the gold. No use settling for bronze.
Don't criticize those searching for a deeper walk with God.
Some people fear drawing closer to God and taking a step of faith in Christ because they're scared of what others might think.
"Oh well i know what he/she did last week, so that's just an act"
"We'll see how long this lasts......"
"He/she is just being condescending"
Do not look down upon those struggling. More so, don't look down upon those who make steps to better their spiritual life.
If they make a personal decision not to do something, not to partake in a popular joke, not to listen to certain things, or TO do certain things, like prayer or bible reading, don't criticize them. They'll get a blessing. Not you. But you will hurt them. Please, be aware of what you say.
Yet praise Him.
Then you maybe realize that you need to take an alternate road.
But. You've been on that road for a while. You can't just leave them hanging.
But. Wonder if they're on the wrong road. Maybe you've found a better road. A, say, cleaner; less hazardous road.
Don't worry about the others. Go for the gold. No use settling for bronze.
Don't criticize those searching for a deeper walk with God.
Some people fear drawing closer to God and taking a step of faith in Christ because they're scared of what others might think.
"Oh well i know what he/she did last week, so that's just an act"
"We'll see how long this lasts......"
"He/she is just being condescending"
Do not look down upon those struggling. More so, don't look down upon those who make steps to better their spiritual life.
If they make a personal decision not to do something, not to partake in a popular joke, not to listen to certain things, or TO do certain things, like prayer or bible reading, don't criticize them. They'll get a blessing. Not you. But you will hurt them. Please, be aware of what you say.
Yet praise Him.
Mar 15, 2010
That's What (The Bible) Said
God has set up systems of boundaries, or whatever you want to call them. Things in scriptures that we should abide by.
God doesn't kill us just because we break those boundaries. But. We can't be as close to Him.
When studying sexual purity, a scripture came up, and i'd say it's worth taking a look at.
Ephesians 5:3-5
3But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people. 4Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving. 5For of this you can be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person—such a man is an idolater—has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God
I could blog many pages on that scripture. But i want to focus on a small percentage of that verse.
"Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place"
Out of that verse. I want to bring up a small percentage in today's world that deals with that verse. You've heard it a million times. I guarantee you've heard it this week. If not today. If not saying it yourself. Four little words. That are acid, destroying the barriers of God's acceptance lines.
That's what she said.
Now. Some may simply smile or chuckle at the very words. I know. I used to. I even said it. Numerous times. And laughed.
Is it appropriate? No. Ephesians 5:4 plainly states that it's not.
Those four words can cause the purest of statements to be taken the completely wrong way. It puts your mind into a sexual thought pattern, and draws you further away from God.
This isn't me on a pedestal or saying i'm better. I'm a peer. To all readers. Simply stating what's in the bible. How I, as much as any, should examine myself and check where things should be prioritized. Is not all sin, sin? I'm not perfect. Even since studying this, i've said it myself and fallen in to the social trap. I need work just as much as any.
A life not under construction is a life without purpose.
Let's diligently take a look at scriptures and apply them to our lives, shall we?
God doesn't kill us just because we break those boundaries. But. We can't be as close to Him.
When studying sexual purity, a scripture came up, and i'd say it's worth taking a look at.
Ephesians 5:3-5
3But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people. 4Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving. 5For of this you can be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person—such a man is an idolater—has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God
I could blog many pages on that scripture. But i want to focus on a small percentage of that verse.
"Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place"
Out of that verse. I want to bring up a small percentage in today's world that deals with that verse. You've heard it a million times. I guarantee you've heard it this week. If not today. If not saying it yourself. Four little words. That are acid, destroying the barriers of God's acceptance lines.
That's what she said.
Now. Some may simply smile or chuckle at the very words. I know. I used to. I even said it. Numerous times. And laughed.
Is it appropriate? No. Ephesians 5:4 plainly states that it's not.
Those four words can cause the purest of statements to be taken the completely wrong way. It puts your mind into a sexual thought pattern, and draws you further away from God.
This isn't me on a pedestal or saying i'm better. I'm a peer. To all readers. Simply stating what's in the bible. How I, as much as any, should examine myself and check where things should be prioritized. Is not all sin, sin? I'm not perfect. Even since studying this, i've said it myself and fallen in to the social trap. I need work just as much as any.
A life not under construction is a life without purpose.
Let's diligently take a look at scriptures and apply them to our lives, shall we?
Mar 11, 2010
hit or miss
some may say it's not worth it
but to giving up, i can't commit
the sunshine of today is gone
but soon faded colors will be withdrawn
i've found a spark of violet beam
of just the thought makes my world gleam
is this true, real, heart-filled
or am i missing the effective build
juxtaposition of life and death
can leave one indebted for breath
to find the one true thing on earth
that always gives your day some worth
to find the one that brings a smile
that makes the long road all worthwhile
to do the thing most right of all
is what i strive for, if you recall
to bring happiness to all mankind
is something that the most won't find
but simply to one of great desired
passion pursued, the truth acquired
-SB
but to giving up, i can't commit
the sunshine of today is gone
but soon faded colors will be withdrawn
i've found a spark of violet beam
of just the thought makes my world gleam
is this true, real, heart-filled
or am i missing the effective build
juxtaposition of life and death
can leave one indebted for breath
to find the one true thing on earth
that always gives your day some worth
to find the one that brings a smile
that makes the long road all worthwhile
to do the thing most right of all
is what i strive for, if you recall
to bring happiness to all mankind
is something that the most won't find
but simply to one of great desired
passion pursued, the truth acquired
-SB
Mar 10, 2010
you
The day you walked out of my life, was the day my heart began to ache for you. For the wisdom you once carried. For your friendship. For your instruction. For your opinion.
You were my leader. You were my mentor. I looked up to you. I sought your guidance. You pushed me to become a better person. You were a constant reminder of how i could deepen my walk with God.
But you walked out of my life.
For what? Was it something I did? I don't know if I'll ever understand.
That's why I must lean on the everlasting arms. Thats why I come to the Master as I am. Heartbroken, and searching for answers.
In my eyes, a good leader is somebody who teaches someone something and leads them to become better, and if the leader falters and strays away, the person they once lead maintains their teachings. That's teaching. That's leading.
You invested something in my life. You helped me with life values. Now you're not here to see that i've carried them out. You're not here to see how much of an impact you've had on my life. You're not here to realize that that what you walked away from is incomparable. You'll never find happiness like the happiness you brought into my life.
Although you'll never read this, this isn't for you. This is for me. This is me trying to understand. And realizing I never will.
I can only hope one day you'll figure out what you want out of life.
I did something today that took every bit of strength in me to do. I went and saw you.
Not to confront you. Not to get you to come back to my life. Not to ask you what happened. Not to slander you. Not to do anything that would make you uncomfortable. But just to see you. Just to say hello. Just to tell you that I missed you. And that I care about you.
I'm not sure if you noticed, by my hands were shaking the whole time. I felt like puking the minute i walked in there. My heart rate was through the roof [not the kind of heart racing i prefer]. I tried to hide it. I tried not to show how weak i was.
I'm not sure if seeing you today did anything for you. But it helped me. After so long of not seeing you, it was just good to see you. I just hope i didn't do the wrong thing. I hope that you saw something you missed. I did. But that's not up to me. It's up to you. It may not ever be the same.
Nonetheless, not a day goes by where I don't think about you. Pray for you.
Step of faith: taken. Word spoken: obeyed. Mission accomplished. That's all that matters.
*God has given me peace. And that peace literally passes all understanding.
I have peace about the situation. And i wouldn't change a thing.
God's love is perfect. Even when i'm not strong.
Again.
God's love. is. perfect.
You were my leader. You were my mentor. I looked up to you. I sought your guidance. You pushed me to become a better person. You were a constant reminder of how i could deepen my walk with God.
But you walked out of my life.
For what? Was it something I did? I don't know if I'll ever understand.
That's why I must lean on the everlasting arms. Thats why I come to the Master as I am. Heartbroken, and searching for answers.
In my eyes, a good leader is somebody who teaches someone something and leads them to become better, and if the leader falters and strays away, the person they once lead maintains their teachings. That's teaching. That's leading.
You invested something in my life. You helped me with life values. Now you're not here to see that i've carried them out. You're not here to see how much of an impact you've had on my life. You're not here to realize that that what you walked away from is incomparable. You'll never find happiness like the happiness you brought into my life.
Although you'll never read this, this isn't for you. This is for me. This is me trying to understand. And realizing I never will.
I can only hope one day you'll figure out what you want out of life.
I did something today that took every bit of strength in me to do. I went and saw you.
Not to confront you. Not to get you to come back to my life. Not to ask you what happened. Not to slander you. Not to do anything that would make you uncomfortable. But just to see you. Just to say hello. Just to tell you that I missed you. And that I care about you.
I'm not sure if you noticed, by my hands were shaking the whole time. I felt like puking the minute i walked in there. My heart rate was through the roof [not the kind of heart racing i prefer]. I tried to hide it. I tried not to show how weak i was.
I'm not sure if seeing you today did anything for you. But it helped me. After so long of not seeing you, it was just good to see you. I just hope i didn't do the wrong thing. I hope that you saw something you missed. I did. But that's not up to me. It's up to you. It may not ever be the same.
Nonetheless, not a day goes by where I don't think about you. Pray for you.
Step of faith: taken. Word spoken: obeyed. Mission accomplished. That's all that matters.
*God has given me peace. And that peace literally passes all understanding.
I have peace about the situation. And i wouldn't change a thing.
God's love is perfect. Even when i'm not strong.
Again.
God's love. is. perfect.
Spring Chisel
So here i'm sitting at starbucks. People stroll in. People leave.
I got my homework done in like, a third of the expected time.
I just love coffee. I really do.
I love when people come in and say they have a "crazy order" and ask for a "caramel macchiato with two extra shots of expresso". Haha, It's ok. I won't judge. It's probably just a little too early.
Chillin' on the TDCCFVCWTWCDL's for now. It's not kosher half way through a 6 mile run. It screams at me.
I'll save it for the better times coming.
I know you think i'm like the.
But.
Ab Eb Bb
I can't wait.
The smile.
The heartbeat.
Concentrating in class yesterday was really hard. I focus in class very well. But sometimes more important things chisel at my thought patterns. Chiseling was done yesterday.
Mar 6, 2010
Happiness Can Linger
Good times are on the way. I can feel them.
It's been god awful quiet today. For many reasons.
The lack of contact i've had with other humans today has taken a toll on me, mentally. Everybody was out of the house most of the day. And when [they] were there, i wasn't.
I don't want to sound like it's been a terrible day. It hasn't. I've got a ton of things done, and caught up on many things. I'll catch up on sleep later!
Nonetheless,
Not much calling. Not much texting. Not much talking. Not much interacting. Not much seeing.
A lot of homework. A lot of translating. A lot of analyzing. A lot of facebook stalking. A lot of looking up words in the dictionary. A lot of thinking. A lot of planning. A lot of typing.
Some running. Some drinking coffee. Some driving. Some lifting. Some eating. Some soreness.
Sometimes i hear songs on the radio and throw out the numbers to the chords they're playing. I'm just. Different at times.
I accept it. Sometimes i over-analyze how little variation there is in the top 40 songs. Lyrically; musically.
Current song: 1. 6. 4. 5. 1. 6. 4. 5. 1. 6. 4. 5. 1. 6. 4. 5. 1. 6. 4. 5.
The spanish language is attracting me more and more each day. It's like a relationship. Except i'm doing all of the 'getting to know' part with the language. It's already set. It knows what it likes and has it's own rules. So it's not as fun as. But, still.
For the record. I'm not going to Argentina next semester. I'm sure i'll post a...post...later about it. Bottom line. It wasn't the will of God. And i'm happy. Good decision.
Can't wait for some sun. And some beach. And some water.
It's been god awful quiet today. For many reasons.
The lack of contact i've had with other humans today has taken a toll on me, mentally. Everybody was out of the house most of the day. And when [they] were there, i wasn't.
I don't want to sound like it's been a terrible day. It hasn't. I've got a ton of things done, and caught up on many things. I'll catch up on sleep later!
Nonetheless,
Not much calling. Not much texting. Not much talking. Not much interacting. Not much seeing.
A lot of homework. A lot of translating. A lot of analyzing. A lot of facebook stalking. A lot of looking up words in the dictionary. A lot of thinking. A lot of planning. A lot of typing.
Some running. Some drinking coffee. Some driving. Some lifting. Some eating. Some soreness.
Sometimes i hear songs on the radio and throw out the numbers to the chords they're playing. I'm just. Different at times.
I accept it. Sometimes i over-analyze how little variation there is in the top 40 songs. Lyrically; musically.
Current song: 1. 6. 4. 5. 1. 6. 4. 5. 1. 6. 4. 5. 1. 6. 4. 5. 1. 6. 4. 5.
The spanish language is attracting me more and more each day. It's like a relationship. Except i'm doing all of the 'getting to know' part with the language. It's already set. It knows what it likes and has it's own rules. So it's not as fun as. But, still.
For the record. I'm not going to Argentina next semester. I'm sure i'll post a...post...later about it. Bottom line. It wasn't the will of God. And i'm happy. Good decision.
Can't wait for some sun. And some beach. And some water.
Mar 5, 2010
Profile of Righteousness
The thought of "less of me, and more of You" may seem cliché, but it's crazy awesome.
I've been waking up with my mind on the things of God more than i believe i ever have.
I've been praying and seeking the will of God more than i ever have. I believe i'm on my way to personal revival. iyfd.
Ye shall know them by their fruits. So true. If that doesn't make you question your life and strive for change, it should.
Last night, I began on a journey with 11 other guys that will give us deeper roots, farther sight, bigger goals, and take us higher in our personal walk with God.
The subject: sexual purity.
For too long men have been quiet about the subject. For too long, fathers, sons, pastors, friends, brothers, etc. have stuck to, what is unofficially known as The Silent Code.
This 'code' is unofficially known by most guys. It basically states that any joke or funny conversation about sex is fine, but when a serious subject comes up, plead the 5th.
Not talking about what most guys deal with is detrimental.
Example. It'd be like a football team that has a terrible defensive line. The QB gets sacked 13 times a game, and the ball is never thrown or carried without a turnover. The team would address the issue and talk about it right? They wouldn't just assume it'd get better. That'd be insanity.
The same concept should be applied in dealing with sexual morality or purity [which is one in the same].
Ephesians 5 states exactly what God feels:
3But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people. 4Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving. 5For of this you can be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person—such a man is an idolater—has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God.a]" style="line-height: 0.5em; ">[a] 6Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of such things God's wrath comes on those who are disobedient. 7Therefore do not be partners with them.
Strong? To some it may seem so. But I'm gonna take the Bible's side with this one. It's plainly stated, and we should obey it. This journey is an 8 week study on the book "Every Young Man's Battle". If you haven't read it, you should.
God impressed me about a year ago that he wanted me to work on this subject with others. I felt that God gave me a big opportunity, yet a large task. Discussions yes, can be awkward, but i'll take awkward over people losing their soul any day of my life. This is me owning the devil and super sizing my spiritual walk with God [and leading others].
It's gonna be an awesome ride. An amazing journey with 11 other guys that I am very serious about helping to deal with what every guy deals with.
Mar 4, 2010
ramblings of the searching.
What can be separated by distance or time?
Many things can. But some things can't.
Some things are unstoppable. That is, in my mind.
At times i have things in my mind worked out, but haven't verbally talked it through.
Questions still permeate my core.
How can one express through words that which cannot be said, but merely felt?
The first time I ever got pulled over, I was going the wrong way on a one way street.
Life generally is two way streets. Make sure you know what kind of road you're traveling on.
I'm a big fan of my heart racing, for many reasons. I'm all about adventure, thrill, adrenaline. Anything i can get into that involves such things, i will. That's why i'm never scared of roller coasters, and one day I will go sky diving.
Sometimes it doesn't take jumping out of a plane to get a rush, sometimes its just a smile.
What i try not to do is jump before making sure my parachute is strapped on. Preparation = key to life. Go with the flow, live life to the fullest, sure. But without a string to hold down the kite, the kite would fly out of control. I pray for the string to guide my life. I pray for those around me. Although i may not know what others' kites are being held by, I maintain mine in hopes it'll fly higher than it could ever by leading it alone.
Direction, prayer, and worship has guided my life throughout the past few weeks. It's amazing what happens when you pray [every day].
Things can just, change. On a dime. You begin to realize things. Notice things. Complacency fades. Priorities are edited.
As Microsoft Word gives us a great example, I want to "save changes".
I want to continue this path that i'm on. Life is a highway. And i want to ride it.
This is the journey. He said he misses the thrill. I'm in the thrill. And i love it.
The not knowing. The pursuing. The reaching. The sending. The hopes. The pure joy. Occasional affirmation. It's all good.
Your eyes are proof enough that there is more to life than chasing fairy tales that change like butterflies.
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